over the past few days,
i've been typing drafts, saving them, deleting them..
i haven't posted in so long, i kinda forgot how to write,
what to write.. or rather, how to properly express myself.
with my love of writing, isn't this pathetic? ):
i just deleted an entire chunk of words. twice.
i guess im really starting to consider,
what do i want to share with the world..
and what.. i'm only willing to share with a select few (;
today, im not going to bother furnishing this post.
no colours, no frills.
--
canoeing formal dinner a few days ago was... idk.
i was glad to see everyone in the same place again;
yet i felt terribly out of place in the damned formal wear.
not to mention, i felt like some fashion police was going
to ambush me for wearing the same thing to the same place twice .__.
if only i could've gathered the courage to heck care
& went in my jeans + tshirt + maybe a vest/blazer ensemble.
if it were in cwss, i wldn't have cared.
"no! everyone's wearing a dress.
the seniors will freaking judge you!"
if i was the me in cwss, that wld never have deterred me.
in fact, it would have delighted me to simply be.. me.
stubborn as hell in my own right,
staying by my beliefs and principles until im convinced otherwise..
which is either impossible or terribly difficult :P
since when have i bowed to such peer pressure?
i have no idea.
since when have i cared what others think?
i didn't want attention, i didn't want to stand out.
still, i felt horribly uncomfortable.
when i got home, i was really thinking, wondering..
and i hated this change in me.
i dont give a damn anymore, i'm gonna be myself.
i'm not going to force myself into sth i feel completely out of..
i'm going to stay true to myself ;D
"when the clock strikes 12, im reverting back.
Reverse Cinderella."
what we are, right now @ 7:28 PM.